Jerking Around the Summer

So the summer session of Jerky Boys has entered playoff mode. That means a nice little summary of how the season wrapped up. I'd tell you about the first playoff game from last night (we won), but since I was planning on an end-of-season recap, I won't discuss playoffs until playoffs are over.

So how'd we wrap up? I didn't get thrown out of any games, despite my last post. We played three games after that post. The first game after, we went against the best team (record-wise) in the league, Pine Riders. They beat us, but only after we took the goal-fest into overtime - they won 11-10 (yikes!) But I got to keep my rage in the cage since they were by far the nicest team this season. Any time I got bumped, there were rounds of apologies, even from guys not involved with the contact.

The following game, we had a second tilt of the season against Hardbodies. I got to have some fun in this one. We lost, but the 2nd period saw some action against their puke-of-the-game, #68. He thought it'd be fun to park his butt on my crease, but what he got was a stick to the back of skates, which caused him to trip into the crease (no penalty). After muttering some not-so-nice-things, he got up and decided to stand in the crease. For that, he got a right-jab to the back along with a few nsfw insults (no penalty). He started to retaliate, but one of my d-men, Lucas, got right in his face, shoving and scrumming it up with #68.

The play went back out to center-rink, before #68 collected the puck and tried to skate through everyone and score, but I stopped him, which didn't mean he stopped being a jagoff. He put his stick in my face, or so it seemed, but the way I made the save had my stick come up and lock his stick into my glove. So when he started to attempt to pull me out of the crease skate away, he didn't get very far, since he wouldn't let go. The puck got loose and batted out of the area, so I let go of my stick so I wouldn't get a penalty for holding his stick (no penalty). He whined about it the whole length of the rink. Honestly, I was surprised the ref didn't give me any penalties for any of those - I wouldn't have faulted the ref had he called a penalty, since I was trying my hardest to get under his skin (success!)

We lost that game, but it had more to do with porous defense than anything #68 did to try to get me off my game (he made a few love-taps at my shoulders).

Last game of the season, we had our second tilt against the Renegades, but the rage stayed caged. No one attempted to crash the net unlike the first tilt (3 crashes, once with my mask coming off). We won that game, which put us up 2-0 against Renegades. It's a shame they got punted from the playoffs in the first round, because going against them would have been a nice treat.

What I learned: in the absence of Spilner (and the presence of his replacement), the defensive chemistry went down. For that matter, I think there were only two games (maybe one) that we had the whole team for, which didn't help, either. I also learned that sometimes I need to take matters into my own hands, a'la the previous post (and it sort of worked against Hardbodies). And while I'm discussing taking things into my own hands, the third thing I learned is that I don't need to be afraid to bring my glove to my right side if it means preventing rebounds and freezing the puck to stop the play. I've been getting burned on low shots after I let up a rebound and the other team scoops it up for an easy goal.

Next post will be the post-playoff wrap-up. Hopefully that won't happen until after August 26th (earliest date of a championship victory), but it won't happen any earlier than August 19th, when round 2 is complete.

What to expect? We play against Pine Riders (nice manners but good enough to play nice). In the other series, hopefully Eternal Underdogs and Hardbodies can bloody themselves against each other to be easy pickings either against us or Pine Riders.

Close Encounters of the Goalie-kind

So I feel like I should clarify my FB post from last night. I posted: "Mark my words. Before the end of this season, if I don't get thrown out pf a game, I will have a double minor." Clearly I was posting from my phone - hence "pf" in place of the obvious "of". But I digress, that's not what I wanted to clarify.

What I want to clarify is that I'm not going to turn dirty (a matter of opinion) or start heckling the refs any chance I get (another matter of opinion). Dating back a few games, there's been a rash of net-crashers on the other team that have frankly gotten away with too much dirt of their own. I've been bowled over, had my mask knocked off my head, and a puck thrown into the goal area (note: area, not the back of the net - this important for later), and dating back to our last playoff game, tripped and injured (technically injured. I bruised.)

Let's go back to that playoff game's incident. The other team started a rush, and one of their wingers was off to the races to try to get a dump-in pass behind our defense. However, our defense interecepted a pass and took the puck back to the other goalie (which eventually led to a goal on that play). In the meantime, Mr. Off-to-the-races (OTTR), kept skating hard and didn't look up until he was practically on top of me. But given his lack of skating ability, he took my feet out from underneath me, and my back landed on one of his skates. I'll tell you now that there is no padding on the back of a goalie's chest protecter - hence the name "chest protector". Goalies aren't supposed to expose their backs to the puck, so it was just deemed an unnecessary waste of materials (and cost) that got cut out sometime back in the, oh I don't know, forever.

No call. Sure, we got a goal, so no penalty would have been served even if it was called, but still. I'm pretty sure when someone gets run into by the opposition and the puck is no where in sight, it should be a penalty. The NHL calls it interference. But at Neville? It's a non-issue. In fact, the refs there obviously hate goalies. I got a nice bruise out of that play. And quite a sore back for a few days. That team (luckily for OTTR) isn't in our league this session, but if they were, I would have already gotten tossed from a game.

Next incident(s) of notice: a few weeks back we played a team called the Renegades. There's a d-bag on that team who apparently thinks the term "crash the net" is literal, because he ran into me 3 times during the game. No calls. It would have been interesting to see if they would have allowed a goal during one of those times that I was knocked over and tangled up. After one of those incidents, one of my d-men, Lucas, gave him a "friendly" shove off the faceoff.

Third incident: this is more of a failing of my d-men to cut off this guy (although were were short a few players), but a team called FDS has this hillbilly-looking guy who was fast and liked to cut across in front of the net in an effort to get me to commit on the near side while he continued to carry the puck to the far side for an empty-net. He was doing a good job of it, too. So I figured that I needed to pokecheck with a bit more aggression (innocent translation: quicker; not-so-innocent translation: take his feet out). The next time he got a breakaway, he started it off the same way. I went down to let him think he could do the same thing again and whipped my stick around, uh, toward the puck... but he shot high on the near side! Goal! But he was still skating, and my stick was still whipping. When I felt his skate touch the stick - YANK! He went flying and rolled a few feet. He had the goal, so I didn't have time to enjoy him lying on the ground. The next time he skated by (the next shift and without the puck), I gave him a nice hard tap to the side of his skate to let him know I knew he was there. He didn't like it. I played innocent to his grumblings. He really didn't like it. But he didn't retaliate, since his team was winning already.

Fourth incident: last night, against a rival (but who's not a rival in an 8-team league?), my opponent (a Mr. Goehring, if he's wearing the correct jersey) had a breakaway opportunity. I stopped it with a nifty little pad stack. The puck went up in the air, where he grabbed the puck (allowed), carried it 3 feet toward the middle of the net (shouldn't be allowed), threw it forward so that it landed in the crease (really shouldn't be allowed), and then tapped it in the open net with his stick (allowed, but not after what he just did... in my opinion). He instantly started yapping at the ref, so I had assumed it was waved off. It wasn't until a few minutes later that I learned they had awarded him the goal. I was steamed I didn't look. If I had looked, I would have been in the ref's face, and he would not have been hearing compliments about his ability to call plays or his looks.  And then Goehring would have heard a few insults his way, too.

So.

I've had it. I told myself after that last playoff game that I was going to stop be Mr. Nice Guy. As a spectator, unless it's the NHL it's always a little embarrassing when a goalie starts a scrum, but I've learned the hard way that the league at Neville simply doesn't care about my safety or fair play. So I'm going to abandon fair play in the name of my own safety. If the refs give me a penalty, I'll give him a reason to give me two. And players crashing the net? They're going to come away bruised. I have a stick like they do, and their ankles won't be the only target. Screeners will start getting "friendly" taps between the legs and "friendly" pushes in their backs.

It's time for the opponent to pay the fee.

Thus, my FB post has been clarified. I'm sure I'll look back on this post later and think "Geez, what an idiot I was", but that's okay.