Flightless Birds

It's been months since I last added a post. And the topic that breaks the hiatus is one that I've been thinking about since the NHL playoffs began a couple weeks ago: Penguins vs. Flyers.

Of course, the series is over, so this is going to be more of a what I expect (and what I want) from the Penguins this summer as well as what I want to happen to the Flyers until the end of their playoff run. As a Pens fan, of course.

Puck Daddy of Yahoo! Sports put it good today: "Fleury and this group will never see another one (Stanley Cup) unless Shero can make some serious adjustments on the goal prevention side, because the blueprint for beating the Penguins has now been written." Italics are mine. In fact, the series against the Flyers makes this statement probably the most apt, despite Malkin and Crosby not being able to make offensive waves or the insane number of bad, bad shots that the Flyers' D-corp blocked throughout the 6 games.

Thus, what Shero should do is:

1) New back-up goaltender - Johnny was good last year, but that's last year. This year, he was shaky and failed to fill in the gap when the Pens d-men faltered, which is what a goalie is supposed to do. And he doesn't even have the benefit of saying he was playing injured: the mystery illness at the end of the regular season shouldn't have spanned the 7 months of games. You can also say Johnny's vulnerabilities this year forced the Flower to play almost 70 games, contributing to what had to be fatigue against a relentless Flyers' offensive barrage.

2) Throw Martin under the bus - if we can't get a bag of pucks for him, then maybe using him as a speed bump will save some lives in a parking lot somewhere. Not sure what happened between last year and this year (it doesn't seem like Bylsma changed the system), but it definitely wasn't an improvement. And he dragged Michalek down as a result. Not saying Z had the best season, either, but doing the work of two d-men can't be conducive to playing well.

3) Get Despres NHL-ready for next season - he showed some offensive and puck-handling skills against the Flyers, even if he wasn't perfect, either. But when you're going against the likes of Giroux, Jagr, and Briere during the playoffs as a rookie and don't have a mental breakdown, that has to be a recommendation. And he's better than Martin, so that's a plus, right?

4) Find an asst coach who knows power plays - I agree with Mark Madden that if you can't get a unit with both Malkin and Crosby to score consistently on the power play, then you need a new coach. Both players are capable of doing what they need to during even strength, so why can't they score with the opposition at an obvious disadvantage? Granted, they try too many passes. Anyone else notice that awful opportunity when a d-man didn't have a stick? No shots. They made it look like they were trying to wear out the Flyers' necks; instead, Bryzgalov managed to get some lateral movement practice. The Pens need - NEED - a new asst coach to focus on improving the power play.

What I expect to happen? Johnny will stick around, since he'll only have one more year on his contract. Martin will be given another chance to redeem himself (and will likely blow it) proving to be a disadvantage during the free agency when Shero will have a good opportunity to get a decent defenseman for a better price than during the season. Despres will get a good shot during training camp and will probably get at least 5 games in to start the 12-13 season, but Martin's continual presence will wreck his chances at a serious stab unless a d-man goes down with an injury. And we won't get another coach.

For the Flyers, I want to first give credit where credit is due: they jumped on their opportunities early and often, they knew how to take advantage of the Pens' system from the second period of game 1, their defense in game 6 was an amazing balance of confidence inspired by already having 3 wins and the urgency to not give the Pens any chances up the middle against the man afraid of bears in the forest - Bryzgalov.

What I wish for them before the playoffs are over:

Schenn gets crushed with a legal bodycheck, preferably an open-ice hit much like Vitale put on Briere during the regular season. He's a big body that hits good, but he's given me too much of a taste for what other fans felt when they were watching Orpik knock over their teams all over the ice.

Talbot gets into a fight and loses some teeth. He's a back-stabbing greedy jagoff. First he made those awful awful A&L commercials that made our ears bleed. Playing for Philthy was rubbing salt in the wounds by making our eyes bleed. It sickens me when big-money sports is able to entice a fan-favorite into a two-faced athlete. The only consolation I have is that he genuinely looks unhappy when he's sitting on the Flyers' bench during games. May he never win another Cup for as long he plays.

For Couturier I only wish more missing teeth. I want him drinking his meals through a straw.

And if the Flyers should make it all the way to the finals, then I want the L.A. Kings on the other side. It would be a temporary suspension of not being allowed to cheer on Mike Richards and Jeff Carter in hoping they poke Bryzgalov full of so many holes that he becomes afraid of pucks. Quick proved himself able to stifle the Vancouver offense, so stopping Giroux and Co. shouldn't be that much more tasking, and who better to wreak havoc through the Flyers' lines than Dustin Brown? And maybe the Scud Missile could get a second Cup ring?

I'd drink to that.